What your body language says about you can attract people or push them away. These non-verbal cues are used universally across all cultures to convey communication. But did you know that you may unknowingly send out the wrong signals to others even when you are not aware that you are doing so?
Using Your Body Language To Attract The Opposite Sex Is Not Hard When You Know Certain Rules
Have you found that one person you want to spend the rest of your life with? Perhaps you’ve not been able to find even that one person to spend a month with or a year? Trying to find a person who is going to love you for who you are can be a complicated task. But did you know that by sending out the wrong signals with your body language you may be damaging your chances of finding that special someone?
ARE YOU SENDING OUT THE WRONG SIGNALS?
But did you know that by sending out the wrong signals you may be damaging your chances of finding that special someone?
The author of Silent Messages, Dr. Albert Mehrabian, has conducted extensive studies on the use of non-verbal cues, or non-verbal communication. His findings are surprising. He found that as much of 55% of our communication is conveyed through non-verbal cues such as posture, bodily gestures, and facial expressions! This is quite astonishing since most of the relationship advice that is found in books, online, or even from relationship coaches and therapists focus on the spoken word. Dr. Mehrabian found that we communicate our messages roughly about 7% with spoken words and about 38% through vocal elements such as inflections and intonations.
WRONG BODY LANGUAGE SIGNALS
Attracting the opposite sex can go from a complicated task to an impossible one if you are sending the wrong signals. However, if you are already in a relationship these wrong body languages can be turning your lover against you. By simply learning to use the right body language, you can attract new people into your life and put the spark back into your current relationship.
Are you sending out the wrong non-verbal cues?
- not making eye contact–people like to look at things they like. By avoiding eye contact with a person you’re trying to attract, you’re telling him that you really don’t like him since you don’t want to look at him. Be sure to make lots of eye contact. Of course, don’t just stare at someone, lest they think you’re a weirdo stalker!
- don’t cross your arms–this is a sure sign that you are closed off and unapproachable. Let your arms relax to your sides or even yet, play with your hair. Any time that you are guarded and shut off from someone you will clutch things close to you, whether it’s your arms or even your purse. Be careful when you are at parties that you are not embracing your purse close to you. Subconsciously you’re sending a “stay away from me” message.
- relax your facial expressions–have you ever been told you have a resting bitch face? Yeah, if you’re not aware of how your face looks when you’re not consciously making any expressions, you may be turning people away because you may look mad, upset, or just generally unapproachable. Make a conscious effort to relax your facial muscles, to think of happy thoughts, and to have a slight smile to make yourself seem open to conversation and less “bitchy”. (I know because that’s something that I personally had to work on!)
There are also many things that can be done while you are out to attract someone special and attractive, especially when you go out to a bar or a party. Simple things just the way you sit and stand are factors at how people perceive you. When you go to a party do you typically stand close to your friends? Do you glance at someone across the room and not get your message across? All of these examples involve the use of body language.
How to Use Your Body Language to Attract Your Mate
If attracting the opposite sex is something you are interested in you are going to need to learn how to use the body correctly. The following tips on proper body language are going to help get your message across that you are looking and available for someone special.
- At a bar, don’t face the bartender–One of the biggest mistakes people make while at a bar is sitting facing the bartender. While you may have some great conversation, you are doing nothing in the way of attracting the opposite sex. If you want to look approachable, you need to sit with your back to the bar. Try it just once and see how many more people come over to talk and offer to buy you a drink.
2. Always keep your eyes in the direction of the center of the room–If you like to go to a bar or party with friends, that is fine. However, you have to be willing to set yourself apart from them and keep your eyes in the direction of the center of the room. In addition, keep your body centered toward wherever the action is. If you are at a dance, point your body toward the dance floor. This is going to make you more approachable as you are already moving in that general direction.
3. Circulate the room with energy and vibrancy–Many people believe that once they are in a club it is best to find a seat and wait for others to gravitate toward you. While it may give you an air of mystery it also makes you unapproachable. Try to canvas the room and always walk with energy as more people will be attracted to you.
4. Be the person others want to be around–You always want to give off a fun sense about yourself. As you walk around the room look and feel happy. Be glad you are alive and you are having a great time and it is going to show through. Do not be afraid to show off the fun and energetic side of yourself. Have fun and laugh a lot, people want to have fun, it is just human nature. If they see you having a good time, they are going to move in your direction!
5. When at parties, stand near the window–One of the best places to stand in a bar or a dance club is directly near the window. For one reason or another, people just tend to gravitate toward it. Whether they are bored or just want to look at the sites, they will come. By claiming the spot, you have a direct line of communication with whoever you choose.
6. The eyes have it! One of the most important ways to attract the opposite sex is with your eyes. You will read it over and over and it is true, the eyes are the most important part of the body. If you can master true eye contact, you will be able to communicate with someone without ever saying a word. Do not be afraid to look down or away. However, you need to know the right signals to send or it may just come off a little creepy! However, if you find someone who has met your gaze and holds it, they want more. So take that opportunity and move toward them, never breaking the line of eye contact.
7. Your lips should speak without uttering a word--This goes without saying but your lips should say “kiss me” at all times. Kissable lips are lips that are parted, pouty, and luscious. You can achieve the luscious look by applying the right makeup. Make your lips so irresistible, that all he’ll want to think about is kissing them! (Check out my review of How to Kiss a Man to Make Him Fall In Love. Your lips are secret weapons and when used effectively, all men are powerless!)
As you can see, it does not have to be impossible to attract the opposite sex, you just need to know how to use your body correctly. Take the time to learn all about using the right body language and you will never have to be alone again.